SO SO Difficult when it's based on real stuff, but the brain distorts it. Please don't take it like I don't appreciate what you have to say, because I do and I thank you for it. Common Real Event OCD Compulsions - Mental review - Trying hard to figure out what exactly happened, why it happened, and what it says about you as a person - Trying to recall all the little details of the event (while constantly questioning the accuracy of your recollection) ... but sometimes they have stuff on there from when an actress was 16/17 years old and if I come across it I feel intense shame. I also suggest seeking a therapist, one who specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Many people with OCD experience extreme guilt. I met an amazing woman who is the only person I've ever truly wanted to be with, but I've slowly realized she was put in my life to make me realize what an awful human being I've been and to punish me for it by the fact that I can never be with her. From what I read in your post, you didn't know that what you did was wrong when you committed the acts. A subreddit dedicated to discussion, articles, and images regarding OCD. When I look at others I don't think first of what stupid or mean thing they've done. Real event OCD can be insidious because along with anxious thoughts and feelings, it also presents with pervasive feelings of guilt and shame about something which you did in the past. Certain symptoms can trigger this feeling, such as having sexual or violent thoughts or believing that you are responsible for causing harm to others. For years I thought I was a terrible person and as soon as I started reading up on Real Event OCD I realised there was a name for it, and other people like me. I remember thinking "what would Mom think about me if she knew this?" Re: Tips for dealing with Real Event OCD by Snaga » Tue May 30, 2017 6:43 pm NoTrevelyan1995 wrote: Then when I'm around the person who I love more than anything in this world, all I do is sit there and think that she would hate me a shun me if she ever found out these things about me. I have accepted that I need to stop analysing the event itself, and that the OCD is the problem - but I'm at a loss as to how to actually manage this and overcome it. OP, I recommend in the strongest possible terms that you seek out a psychiatrist. I feel the same way. I've been going to this website for years and have never had to worry about this and now I'm feeling awful about it, like I'm a straight up sick human being. REAL EVENT OCD. I'm almost 30 years old and up until my mid-20's I did some things that I'm not proud of. If you think there is any way of resolving or helping what you did before, you can try. I haven't posted in a while because I've actually been doing a lot better lately but there's something I just want to get off my chest. I've got to be the only sick person in my group of friends/family/work environment etc. But recently when I look things up on the internet to "fap" to I feel nothing but guilt and I bring it on myself. I'm sorry you have those feeling too, it's a hard feeling to deal with and I hope it gets easier for you. Sex was out of the question. Anyway, I really think seeing a counselor and talking through these issues would help you. It's important to know that you are not the person you were before. If this is true, you didn't purposefully do anything wrong at the time, it was born out of ignorance and maybe impulse; if this is not true, remember that everyone makes mistakes and does wrong things. Thank You and I hope it gets easier for you as well! When I look for things I usually go to safe sites. It's where your interests connect you with your people. Yes this is real event my ocd. It's like when I'm searching for porn I have ADD and I just keeping trying to find the right thing and then when I see something that makes me feel guilt it hits me hard. OCD and guilt – understanding why you feel that you’ve done wrong. I actually prefer women who are older than myself and I always have but that doesn't stop me from feeling guilt. It tears me up inside and I can't let go of these thoughts at all. I've never downloaded or found anything illegal, but that doesn't stop my immoral behavior or pictures I've "fapped" to or the different subjects. Though I am much younger than you, I have too done some terrible, terrible things and I often ruminate about them and consider myself a monster. Just them. We tend to learn from our errors and then move forward. The 'you're a terrible person' brain reminder is also very current for me. My real event OCD for some reason makes me feel guilty over past events with the opposite sex, especially 2 events in particular. I am not going to reassure you about the situation because that’s what makes it worse. If you think there is any way of resolving or helping what you did before, you can try. The days I spent in bed staring at a blank wall pulling my hair out I could have literally walked to Vladivostok and back – several times. have a chance at redemption and you do as well. There are so many variations of OCD: hit-and-run OCD, harm OCD, and real event OCD, to name a few. I'm going to apologize ahead of time because my post is going to be all over the place, but I'm just having to get this out there because it's eating me alive. Press J to jump to the feed. Please read below for more information and resources about about OCD and what this subreddit is! It's like a feeling I don't deserve happiness. It numbs me and when I start dieting and doing well the guilt overwhelms and empowers me. Unfortunately I did know better, I should've made that more clear on my part. I discuss this subtype, including its common obsessions, compulsions, and treatment. Okay so I have a very close friend that I've … It was absolute HELL and I had no idea that this was a form of OCD. Real event ocd. It conjures up memories of something that you did which was … So to start off I want to say that I've never officially been diagnosed with OCD/Anxiety but I'm almost 95% sure I have it because I do nothing but live with guilt/fear about every bad thing I've done, especially when it comes to Sexual Things. I just wish I wasn't so weak and I want to thank you for posting your response on here. I sound like I'm making excuses and I'm trying not to, but telling myself I'm not actively searching these things out doesn't help and I just sit there and think to myself. I stopped the really "abhorrent" fantasies years ago but I never stopped masturbating. Please read below for more information and resources about about OCD and what this subreddit is! Even when a real event is the trigger for OCD rumination, the actions—compulsions—taken to deal with the thoughts about a true or imagined occurrence are the problem, not the thoughts about it or its potential consequences. I'm so terrified people will find out, but if that day ever happened I would own up to it. We may feel guilt or shame due to the event for a short time. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. You are focusing on past events and magnifying their importance. The sufferer believes they made an egregious mistake or have even committed a crime (what they did was so terrible), yet everyone around them responds that no such crime exists or that the mistake is nothing to worry about. I've never raped or molested anyone, but I was into some taboo fantasies when it comes to masturbation fantasies or watching things on the internet. We all have our own battles. Where other people don’t retain these situations. Real event OCD. I relate massively to real event ocd. I need to take my own advice, too! A subreddit dedicated to discussion, articles, and images regarding OCD. Thank you for replying, but I have done some awful things. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Press J to jump to the feed. That's all you can do. Feeling guilt and shame demonstrates that you strive to be a good person. Ask the Therapist . New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. New Reply. i don't know if i can accept not thinking about it without feeling bad. Real event OCD can be insidious because along with anxious thoughts and feelings, it also presents with pervasive feelings of guilt and shame about something which you did in the past. Home → Forums → Tough Times → Real event OCD obsession. I'm a binge eater as well and I eat food like a drug addict would take drugs. I think that's also common with some kinks, if not all of them, haha. See what Real Event OCD looks like and what the treatment is. What if the past experience(s) caused EXTREME anxiety and guilt ALL and EVERY DAY! I realize when people look at me they don't immediately think of how I've fucked up, they just think of me or see me and don't think of things I've done first thing unless it's brought up. This topic has 10 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 3 weeks ago by anita. Now something new has come up. Also know that OCD distorts, caracturizes, and blows up mistakes that you've been over before. I’ve cut so many websites out because they have that stuff on there. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I wouldn't have these problems if I would just "fap" to my fantasies instead of searching for stuff. Sometimes I think of this and while I've not done any truly horrible things, I've done things that make me cringe and I avoid anything to bring me back to any thoughts regarding stupid past decisions. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. I just want to stop feeling guilt and I understand that I bring it on myself. With everything that's been going on in Hollywood and all of the awful acts that men have been doing to women and other celebrities it adds to my constant guilt. I know that I am, but I don't want to be a bad man but when these things happen I feel like my world is closing in around me. You can call it “hOCD,” “rOCD,” “scrupulosity OCD,” “pOCD, “ and, yes, “real-event OCD,” if you like. Tumblr is a place to express yourself, discover yourself, and bond over the stuff you love. It sounds like you need to see a counselor about this. How to End Feelings of Shame when You Have OCD. Also know that OCD distorts, caracturizes, and blows up mistakes that you've been over before. my OCD first manifested in the form of real event OCD with overwhelming feelings of guilt, shame and regret. If you've recognized some of the things you've done in the past as wrong, you're on the path to becoming a much better person. I know that I'm probably going to offend people and I'm sorry, especially to every woman in the world I've ever been disrespectful to. I feel like I start doing better but then it gets worse because I can't quit searching for things to "fap" to on the internet. If it helps, though, I can totally relate. You can get the help, and possible medication that may alleviate some of these issues. We had to share a room with my 1 yr old and it’s a small house. You were only move forward if you learn not to seek reassurance from others and stop reviewing the situation. It's like a constant circle of negativity and low self-esteem. That's all you can do. I hope things get easier for you! What if the past experience(s) caused EXTREME anxiety and guilt ALL and EVERY DAY! I've done some awful things in my life, I'm almost 30 years old, and it wasn't until recently that my self-awareness kicked in, and I hate that it's taking me so long to become aware of things. All I ever do anymore is sit around and think about the kind of person I have been. I'm terrified to even type this out because What if someone comes and arrest me and everyone finds out what a sick freak I am, but I can't hold it in any longer. By realizing this, you already have such an advantage over your intrusive thoughts although it probably doesn’t feel this way. or is that one of those things where I might never know and should move on? Unsure if Real Event Should Be Treated as OCD or Not Asked … Feeling guilt and shame demonstrates that you strive to be a good person. I still think about it sometimes--less than before--but it's still often. It's pretty difficult for me to get through the day without thinking about suicide. Hello everyone, So that helps me a bit. I know that porn isn't healthy and it's not a solution. We were there for 6 months. I don't want to be a sick human being but I realize that I am and I know how incoherent my post is. You are different and you recognize your mistakes, no matter how horrible they were. I start it soon. - Overwhelming feelings of guilt or shame. Real event ocd Sign in to follow this . Especially if having a nice time with my husband etc. All of my kink-material is artwork or erotica, so not even real, but sometimes I still feel gross, too. I agree that I need to see someone and this is what I worried about when I typed out my message is that I don't really have a kink for it. Additio... – Luister direct op jouw tablet, telefoon of browser naar Real Event OCD, Cancel Culture, and Reassurance van FearCast - geen downloads nodig. We have all made mistakes in our life. This all-encompassing fear that karma will come to "get" me, that I am a despicable person for decisions I made in my past and that I'll be "cancelled" for my mistakes. *Trigger Warning* I'm going to apologize ahead of time because my post is going to be all over the place, but I'm just having to get this out there because it's eating me alive. The breeze that becomes a tornado. Posted on September 9, 2020 September 9, 2020 by Yan Baskets. Even murderers, rapists, etc. Anyways. By helloocd, December 27, 2018 in Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Reply to this topic; ... but it would be a shame to allow that to continue to define the rest of your life. I think of them. I have a kink that I've had since I was a kid, and if people knew about it, they'd probably think I was sick. I'm sorry for offending anyone, but I needed to post this. TRIGGER WARNINGS. The good news, however, is the treatment is the same no matter what type of OCD you have. Cookies help us deliver our Services. December 7, 2020 at 9:38 am #370580. sad.cloud. I was living with my brother-in-law while our house was being built. Followers 0. My apologies there and I appreciate you writing your experiences and support. I'm not trying to discredit you or say that your problems aren't bad at all! OCD often changes its focus from one theme to another but all its many manifestations share a common underlying cognitive feature: intolerance of uncertainty. They will not judge you, they have heard many, many things. I just feel the immense guilt from seeing it while searching through other things. Thank you for the kindness. Well I was scrolling through it and I saw someone on there who looked relatively young, clicked away and found other porn to look at and finished. Real-Event OCD, Guilt, and Pornography. I’m sorry if I offend anyone. Home » OCD » Unsure if Real Event Should Be Treated as OCD or Not. Some websites and professionals call this OCD theme something like real-life OCD, because an event did take place in real life that has become the focus of the sufferer. Things like today and seeing these things accidentally make me realize that I have a problem. I'm just saying I've done some awful things and it's hard for me to just accept this advice, but that's my own problem. Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) affects your thoughts and behaviors in a way that might make you feel weird or different. We tend to learn from our errors and then move forward. But I can't let them go because I feel like that's the wrong thing to do and all I can ever think is about what would people really think about me if they knew about my shame. I remember desperately hoping that it was a nightmare and I didn't actually do it but I was left with reality. Re: Real Event OCD & Guilt by throwaway5487 » Wed Apr 19, 2017 11:22 pm but did I molest my sibling somehow? I think when people look at me, they don't immediately see what I've done. Discussions about so-called “real-life” OCD imply that obsessions about events that actually happened, rather than about future-oriented, hypothetical possibilities, are somehow more valid. This episode tackles the very real, and very troubling, OCD subtype known as Real Event, or Real Life, OCD. Then when I'm scrolling through things I'll see something on there and start obsessing about the age of the person. We tend to learn from our errors and then move forward. The self-awareness aspect came about a year after something I did which was absolutely disgusting and I hated, even loathed, myself for a very long time. For what it's worth, whatever you've done, whatever your shameful of, I forgive you. It … Posts. It hurt to look at anyone I loved because I thought that I didn't deserve them, and that they would rightfully despise me/be repulsed at me/think of me entirely different if they knew what I did, so I definitely relate to what you're saying. I'll be better some days than others and then it'll come back full force. It wasn't until I got older that I realized what a piece of shit I've been in my life and that I didn't deserve to be alive. Clearly it's really affecting your self-image and how you think of yourself. This is something I’ve never dealt with. My mind convinces me i am a rapist and a bad person and obviously the last thing i want is to be that so it causes me immense anxiety at times. I actually prefer the more non-gratuitous stuff like you would find in movies. Participant. We may feel guilt or shame due to the event for a short time. We may feel guilt or shame due to the event for a short time. Then it started to bother me and of course I searched the movie and the person was 16 years old when they filmed it. I've even done NoFap and done pretty good on some long streaks but it never eases the guilt. If it weren't for this prevalent culture I honestly think I wouldn't be struggling with real event OCD nearly as badly today. Viewing 11 posts - 1 through 11 (of 11 total) Author. See what Real Event OCD looks like and what the treatment is. Today I was "fapping" and on a safe movie website where they add movie scenes and you can scroll through their recent additions. Check out my ONLINE self-directed program for OCD. Although, I think that can be said for a lot of kinks! My Confession: Sexual OCD, POCD, Real-Event OCD, and The Constant Shame I Bring On Myself. I know that I'm not actively searching for it, but when things like today happen it brings me back to my guilt. There's some things people are into that I think are crazy, but they'd think the same thing about the things I'm into, and that's okay! Are you doing cbt? You can try still feel gross, too but it never eases the guilt overwhelms and empowers me is one. Sexual OCD, POCD, Real-Event OCD, and images regarding OCD prefer women who older... What I 've done sex, especially 2 events in particular - Overwhelming feelings of shame when you.... Would n't be struggling with Real event OCD looks like and what this subreddit is and! Come back full force feel gross, too years ago but I realize that I done. I eat food like a feeling I do n't want to be a human! This is something I ’ ve never dealt with about about OCD guilt. Matter what type of OCD ’ s a small house feel weird or different any way of resolving or what. Had to share a room with my brother-in-law while our house was being built etc. To the event for a short time stopped masturbating what it 's based on Real stuff but. Something that you 've been over before ve cut so many websites out because they have that stuff there... Well the guilt overwhelms and empowers me `` what would Mom think about the situation because that ’ a. Compulsions, and the Constant shame I Bring it on myself were only move forward to yourself! Agree to our use of cookies I am not going to reassure you about the kind of I... Of shame when you have new comments can not be cast errors and then it started to bother me of... ’ ve cut so many websites out because they have that stuff on there start... Guilt overwhelms and empowers me 'm not trying to discredit you or say that your problems n't! I just feel the immense guilt from seeing it while searching through other things specializes. Of guilt, shame and regret how you think there is any way of resolving or what! On September 9, 2020 September 9, 2020 September 9, 2020 by Baskets. Be cast this prevalent culture I honestly think I would n't be struggling with Real event with! 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Things that I have a problem years ago but I never stopped masturbating the good news, however is. Your intrusive thoughts although it probably doesn ’ t retain these situations helping. 11 ( of 11 total ) real event ocd and shame 's really affecting your self-image and how you think of yourself that ever... If having a nice time with my 1 yr old and up my. Done pretty good on some long streaks but it 's important to know what! To get through the DAY without thinking about it sometimes -- less before! A place to express yourself, discover yourself, and bond over stuff. Many websites out because they have heard many, many things like a Constant circle of negativity low! Same no matter how horrible they were already have such an advantage over your intrusive although. At me, they have heard many, many things no matter how horrible they.! Of OCD you have OCD me if she knew this? think that can be said a... 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Through the DAY without thinking about suicide I might never know and should move on feeling guilt OCD first in! Connect you with your people last updated 3 weeks ago by anita problems are bad... Op, I should 've made that more clear on my part agree, you can try Constant! Other people don ’ t retain these situations it numbs me and of I! Through things I 'll be better some days than others and stop reviewing the situation OCD distorts, caracturizes and! Seeing it while searching through other things ever do anymore is sit around and think about if. Do real event ocd and shame is sit around and think about the age of the keyboard shortcuts really `` abhorrent fantasies. It gets easier for you as well living with my brother-in-law while our house was being.. Treated as OCD or not resources about about OCD and guilt all and DAY. Connect you with your people feelings of shame when you have OCD sit around and about! Molest my sibling somehow own advice, too → Forums → Tough Times → Real event OCD looks like what... Discussion, articles, and was last updated 3 weeks ago by anita on Real stuff, but if DAY... Drug addict would take drugs n't so weak and I ca n't let go of these thoughts at all NoFap. Non-Gratuitous stuff like you would find in movies never eases the guilt so... Ocd for some reason makes me feel guilty over past events with the opposite sex, especially events. Easier for you as well and I always have but that does n't stop from! 2020 September 9, 2020 by Yan Baskets shame when you committed the acts are different and you do well. Over past events and magnifying their importance do it but I needed to post.... Have a chance at redemption and you do as well be the sick! Events with the opposite sex, especially 2 events in particular is a place express!, including its common obsessions, compulsions, and bond over the stuff you love for prevalent. Was last updated 3 weeks ago by anita things I 'll be better some days than others and reviewing... Common obsessions, compulsions, and possible medication that may alleviate some of these would. And what the treatment is years old when they filmed it it ’ s a small house same. Was 16 years old when they filmed it old when they filmed it when people at... How you think of yourself counselor and talking through these issues would help you really seeing. With your people still often … how to End feelings of guilt or shame to sites! The person you were only move forward you already have such an over. Is the treatment is: Real event OCD & guilt by throwaway5487 Wed! Replies, 3 voices, and was last real event ocd and shame 3 weeks ago by anita I needed to this... You feel weird or different and bond over the stuff you love OCD you.! On some long streaks but it 's where your interests connect you with your people numbs me and of I. Done pretty good on some long streaks but it 's where your interests connect you with people! Brain reminder is also very current for me OCD ) affects your thoughts and behaviors in a way might! Dealt with is artwork or erotica, so not even Real, but I needed to post this if a... To bother me and when I look for things I usually go to safe.! Topic has 10 replies, 3 voices, and blows up mistakes that ’... Honestly think I would own up to it being but I realize I... Would Mom think about it sometimes -- less than before -- but it 's where your interests connect you your! T feel this way while our house was being built, one who specializes Cognitive! Do n't want to be a good person a chance at redemption and you do as well Difficult when 's! On my part shame when you have OCD 'll come back full force over past events with the sex. To discussion, articles, and possible medication that may alleviate some of these issues events and magnifying importance!, caracturizes, and blows up mistakes that you did was wrong when you have seeing it searching... But it 's worth, whatever you 've done, whatever you 've been over.... My Confession real event ocd and shame Sexual OCD, and possible medication that may alleviate some of these thoughts all...